What NOT to do After a Binge

Let’s explore what NOT to do after a binge. This is a really important topic. Because, what I see over and over again in my clinical practice is that the very steps many of you take after a binge, are also the actions that keep you IN the binge and restrict patterns, and thus in your eating disorder.

After you binge there is likely a sense of urgency to feel better, to “fix” it, to undo the “damage”, as well as strong feelings of guilt and shame for what has happened. These feelings that came up for you are completely normal, but they do often cause a knee jerk reaction to engage in the behaviours I will list below. But knowledge is power. By bringing awareness to these behaviours, it better enables you to make a different choice. Because, even in recovery, binges happen. Your recovery is not linear. The difference however, between being in recovery and being in your eating disorder, is how you choose to navigate it when a binge happens. Do you make choices to align with your eating disorder by staying within the same patterns? Or do you choose to care for and support yourself and make an alternate choice to do something different this time?

So read below about what not to do after a binge, and know that it is totally OK if you are currently doing any or all of these things. In fact, it is normal. So be kind to yourself, and take this as learning and awareness, and an opportunity to make a choice next time that breaks the pattern.

3 Things NOT to do After You Binge:

1. Start a new diet.

This is hands down the most common action I see. The urge to pick a new diet to regain control is strong after a binge. So I would gently ask you the following questions: Has any diet worked for you thus far? Or has every diet failed, and ultimately led to the next binge? Likely, a diet has not worked for you or you wouldn’t be here reading this. And guess what? Diets don’t work for anyone. They serve to take you away from your intuition of what your body needs and when, and to become dependent on an outside source to tell you this. That is simply not sustainable!

So no, you are not the anomaly. It is not you who doesn’t work, it is the diet. And no, the next diet will not miraculously be the one, after what has very likely been decades of dieting. It will simply keep you in a binge and restrict pattern. So I really encourage you to resist the idea to begin a new diet or meal plan. Take a few deep breaths. Calm your body down. Self care. Get a good night sleep. And choose to nourish your body with all your meals and snacks, including all food groups. Restriction always leads to binges.

2. Compare.

This means that you must put the phone down (and computer…and tablet…and any other social media device!). Do not look at old pictures of yourself in a body you felt was more “acceptable” and do not compare yourself to friends and influencers. This literally will accomplish nothing except making you feel badly.

Instead, choose to be kind to yourself. What can you do to build yourself up? To help yourself feel better? By bringing yourself down using comparison to an old version of yourself or to others, you are again keeping yourself in your eating disorder. Choose compassion over comparison.

3. Isolate.

Often, the times when we need the most support, is when we shut ourselves off from those who love and care for us. But what I know for sure, is that the eating disorder lives in secret. Remaining a secret keeper will keep you in your binge eating disorder. Likely, you want to isolate because you feel shameful of what you have done, and uncomfortable in your physical body. By opening your doors and opening yourself to others, you create space to show yourself that it is OK. Your are OK. You are loved and accepted just as you are. You do not need to change your physical self to receive this love. I mean it. ..and if you don’t believe it, re-read it a few more times! ;)

The next time you binge, can you reach out for support? Can you call someone? Invite someone over? Explore how you can find some space to come as you are.

Before I sign off today, I would like you to know, that if these relate to you at all…take it as a sure sign you are not alone. If you could be a fly on the wall during my client sessions, you would most surely exhale a sigh of relief. You are not engaging in things that no one else is, you are not the one off person who won’t be able to recover and stop binge eating, and it is not hopeless. It is absolutely possible to experience a full recovery. Start with small steps such as choosing again to any of the actions I listed above. There is truly no step too small, and every new action leads to a new reaction. One step towards recovery and self care will flow into the next. And as always, if you need support, I am here- reach out!